Project Status: Phase 4 - Emergency Briefing

CRITICAL SITUATION: The project is on the brink of catastrophic failure. The code is a mess, the team is on the verge of mutiny, and the coffee machine is on strike.

Technical debt is spiraling out of control. We need to address it, or we'll never make it out of phase 4.

The team is on the edge of a full-blown mutiny. We need to get them some snacks, or at least a better break room.

The communication channels are clogged with more than just water cooler chat. We need to unclog them, or we'll drown in bureaucracy.